Credit to Marcin Rybarczyk www.wizualnie.com
I received my occupational health report this morning, which made for interesting reading. I might be a little cranky today, okay? So keep that in mind. My work deciding not to pay me anything for the month also didn’t help. (They have reconsidered after many phone calls and emails.)
So, the first thing the report says, on the very first page, is that I’m fit to return to work immediately – remember that!
Then page two began with an introduction from the medical company who said I’d been referred so my employer could find out what my conditions are, whether me working 22.5 hours a week is suitable, how much sickness am I likely to have, whether I still need to work from home and why, and finally whether I’d be covered under the Disability Discrimination Act (NO, it doesn’t exist anymore).
They continue to say I have a number of conditions which include a “so-called connective tissue disorder.” What the hell is that meant to mean? There is NOTHING so-called about Ehlers-Danlos, thank you very much. Then they say I have Fibromyalgia, which is “aches in various joints.” Oh, I wish.
Then the report writer passes it over to the doctor. Thank god, I’ve had enough of that little weasel.
The GP clarifies my actual conditions, where I’m at with medication and medical treatment. That I scored highly for anxiety and depression, and that I looked ‘profoundly unwell.’
He then says I am currently unfit to return to work, although he notes I would like to continue working. He says office based work is completely unsuitable currently due to high levels of pain and fatigue, but perhaps some limited home working would be good if it could be accommodated.
He ends by saying he thinks I would be covered under the Equality Act, under the disability provision.
But now we’re back to the weasel of a report writer, who says again I’m unfit for work (so why did page 1 say I could go back immediately?) He then says I undoubtedly have genuine physical and non-physical problems and that he was surprised to see I have been able to achieve the levels of work that I have over the last few years. Aw, that’s nice.
Then he turns on me and stabs me in the back.
He says commercially they need to consider if they cope with high levels of absence, whether I can work from home with the impact it will have on their ‘commercial value,’ and says he sees no likelihood of recovery for me, as my conditions are degenerative and not cureable.
Wait, we’re getting to the good part, where he shoves that knife in. “From my reading of the referral note further home working may not be possible which then potentially leads to a question of capability. It would be of course for the company to consider the questions and answers regarding home working, and if not a possibility than a careful response needs to be formulated to avoid critics in the event of any challenge.”
So reading between the lines, I will clarify for everyone. We recommend she works from home, which is perfectly reasonable, as she has been doing that for the past three years in the same job, had low sickness levels, and has been damn good at her job. But you probably can’t be arsed to put that in place, so just kick her out on capability grounds- but do it carefully so she can’t sue you. Oh, then we’ll send this report straight to her so she can read this little shitty suggestion.
Well, fuck you too.